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Hair By Yell

9/28/2012

One day I was getting ready for work and I must've yelled at Alec or I was just being yellie , I guess, because Alec said to me,

"You should work at Hair by Yell because all you do is yell!"

(The salon I worked at is called, Hair by Terri)

I went to work that night and had to share that with Terri and all the clients, it was too funny not to share.

And of course after Alec said this to me, I burst out laughing along with Keith, Cassidy and Alec. He would always say something so funny to turn that frown upside down.

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That's what Al would do

9/26/2012

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So on Monday, we were sitting on the front steps of our house. and we see one of those guys walking the neighborhood going door to door selling something. My thought was to go in the house and shut the door and not answer, but Keith said, " I guess I better stay out here and talk to him. I stayed and kind of listened, I think he was selling roof installation. But I was more listening to how nice Keith was to him. The guy talked to Keith for about 10 minutes and only about 2 minutes of it was about what he was selling. As the guy walked away, I could tell that Keith just brightened his day , just by listening to what he had to say. I could see it in him as he walked away-- he left with a smile and a spring to his step.
I said to Keith, "how are you so nice?"
Keith later said to me, "You asked how I can be so nice to that guy, it's because that is what Alec did. Alec would've talked to that guy and asked his name and asked about him and really listened to him and in turn the guy would've loved talking to Alec and would've walked away with a smile and a happy feeling and his day would've been brighter, because that is what always happened with Al."
It's true
Plus he said " the guy is just doing his job-- doing what he has to do"

Cassidy asked Keith what the guy said to him and Keith said,
"Well, he told me about roof shingles. And then about how his girlfriend proposed to him this weekend and how his Mom just called him and everyone is calling him. He said he never had so many messages on facebook. He told me how he used to have a jeep with 220,000 miles on it. And he told me it was gonna rain tommorow."
Cassidy chuckled at this, but we all got a lesson from Keith which came from Al, which was just take a minute be kind . I'm so sure that this guy appreciated Keith's kindness because I'm sure so many people (like me) would not answer the door or would've just said I'm not interested.

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"I have something to make you happy"

9/25/2012

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These have been some hard days. And I have been consumed by how much I hurt. Not being able to see or deal with how much Keith and Cassidy hurt too. I know Keith and Cassidy hurt and miss Alec the same as me, but somehow they still go on and live life. I asked them how they do it, and Keith answered without hesitation, he said, "because Alec did not have an easy life, he had to go through so many things that were painful and awful, he had to go get a needle every week, chemo, and so much more, yet despite all this, he loved life , he made the best he could out of every day, he found joy everywhere and in everything. He cared about everyone and everything. He hated getting a needle and did not want to do it, but he did do it. And while he hated that part, he found joy and happiness on his visits to the clinic -- he made the best of it-- everyday".
I know this and I do remind myself of all Alec endured and think how dare I complain about living when he did not ever complain. I say to myself how dare I ask Alec to have the will to live when I do not.
I share with you all to love and live like Alec and I can not . It is so hard to do, Alec made it look so easy. But I am very aware of how selfish I have been , thinking that I hurt the most and finding every reason not to live life. I have read every book on people's true stories of loss and how they came to live life again -- trying to see how they did it and hoping I could do what they did. And I didn't need to read any one else's story, I only need to learn from my greatest teacher Alec, how to live life despite the worst of circumstances. I don't know why I needed Keith to remind me of this, but I did. Keith also said that, he feels the same feelings I do and when he gets so sad and overcome with his sadness, he gets a sign from Al, and he know Al is saying , I'm right here and I have something that will make you happy.
Whenever any one of was upset about something, Alec would come right over to us and say,
"I have something that will make you happy" ,
and he would wrap his arms around our necks and give us the sweetest hug and sweetest kiss. And it always made us happy, he always took us out of whatever it was that we didn't need to be upset about and took us into his world where there was only love and happiness. It was like pure magic.
I was told by someone about a year ago, (I'm not sure if she would want me to share who), but this person was having a very difficult time-- being diagnosed with cancer, and she told me that what helped her to face it and everything that comes with it was Alec. She said if Alec could go through it and be as happy as he was, then she could too.
So I am going to do my best to live and love like Al.

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Science 23

9/21/2012

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In school today , we had science and we had to read a book called Hoot. I was absent the day they started, so the teacher had to tell us what page to read to. She said "Read to page 23, because that starts chapter 2". And she said page 23 , like 5 times.
She could have just said read until chapter 2, but she didn't, she kept saying read til page 23.

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not a good day, NOT A good day

9/21/2012

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These have been some extra-difficult days for me, I thought about what Al used to say, which was,

"not a good day --NOT A good day".

He was always so silly and when he said this it was usually referring to something silly or not that important. Like if something spilled or a toy broke etc...
He always said the first "not a good day" at regular speed and then the second part he would say it slow and emphasize the
"NOT"- and then "A good day" at regular speed.

He got us all of us to say it along with him whenever something was not going right.
I've been playing it in my head this week and hearing Al's sweet voice in my mind saying it.

Al's been giving his Mama extra love with continuous 23's. All day long no matter how many e-mails I get and delete, there is always 23 in our inbox. Spending $23- at the store, hearing someone on tv say 23 throughout the day.
I feel your love Al. Mama loves you

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Thank you

9/21/2012

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I want to thank everyone who has sent over or dropped by gifts / donations. You have all been so generous and will surely brighten a child's day. I can feel the love for Alec and us and all of the children who will be touched from all of you.
Cassidy loves to see what people have given, you all brighten her day and our day too.
Thank you all so much

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CLOEY!!!!!!

9/18/2012

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one night when mom was at work and me and dad where down the hall and Al was out in the living room we heard Al yell" haha come look". I ran out to look at what he was doing and he was standing behind the railing in the living room holding Cloey over the stairs! I ran over and grabbed Cloey away from him and yelled " Dad come look". I told dad that alec almost dropped Cloey down the stairs and he said'' Al you cant do that". And all Al did was keep laughing!! :]
-Cassidy

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The Time is 10:23

9/16/2012

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Cassidy was holding her ipod in her arms this morning against her while holding other things. And her ipod said,
"The Time is 10:23". She has a setting on her ipod that when you ask it what time it is it will tell you, but she did not put it on and did not ask it-- it just said it.

We know it was Al saying Hi Taa and giving his love to his Sister.

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Crap sandwich

9/14/2012

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On the way home from work I listen to sports radio . One day the show I listen to said its like eating a crap sandwich. I don't remember what he was referring to but I do know Alec loved this story , I had to tell it to him all the time and every time he would crack up laughing. So now I can only listen for 10 minutes (it's not a long ride home anymore) but today the same crap sandwich guy said he would give a prize to whoever answered his question first , he then said I don't know maybe a gold star -- no better yet, I'll give You a GIRAFFE sticker. Just Al letting me know he with me.
Love You Buddy

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Cross your fingers

9/13/2012

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Keith came home from work yesterday and told me that the guy he works with "Al", yes his nickname is Al (that is an amazing story in itself). Well Al had put a piece of wood in the machine, but it didn't come out right. Keith said he shook his head at him (joking), so Al put the piece of wood in again- hoping it would come out right this time. Then Al crossed both his fingers and showed Keith and he said "It always works". Keith said "I Know". Keith told me this with a smile and tears in his eyes.

Alec always would cross his fingers when he hoped for something, at first he couldn't do it on his own so we would put his fingers in the cross position for him. And it always worked for him. (We all had to cross our fingers with him.) Whether it was for no traffic on the way to the Clinic, or for his port to work that day, or so he wouldn't need the drops in his eyes on his eye appt., or for there to be an Otis Spunkmayer muffin for him, and so much more.......

Before Keith got home , Cassidy made an obstacle course for the cats, and she said "I hope it works", I crossed my fingers and I thought of how Al always crossed his fingers when he hoped for something and it always worked. Of course the obstacle course did work and Cloey (her cat) ran right through it.
Then keith came home with this amazing story and sign that he got from Al. --- Amazing

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